Will Smith: Jaden's choices can be "really terrifying"

by

Sara McGinnis

posted in Celebrities

Will Smith and his wife, Jada Pinkett-Smith, are well known for marching to their own parenting beat. Their two children together, 17-year-old Jaden and 15-year-old Willow, give unusual interviews and speak freely of their disdain for school -- and sometimes I get the impression these famous parents feel as though they have things figured out.

When I picture Will and Jada at home with their kids there isn't sweat popping out on their brows or tension-clenched jaws. They're relaxed, inspired and dreaming up an artsy way to welcome the next supermoon.

One shouldn't make too many assumptions, however.

"Your kids seem to have a lot of freedom of expression," BBC Radio 1Xtra host A.Dot recently said to Will Smith during an interview before asking, "Is that something that you consciously encourage them to have?"

"Yeah, I think it may have been a mistake," the actor laughed in reply. "I think we may have gone too far."

Jokes aside though, Will did have some thoughts to share on Jaden's gender-fluid style. You'll recall the young star started wearing dresses in 2015, and recently surprised everyone by being named the new face of Louis Vuitton's womenswear campaign.

"You know, there's a really powerful internal quality as an artist that as parents we encourage," Will Smith went on to say. "You gotta get out on the edge, you have to try things, you have to be comfortable doing things that people don't agree with and you have to be comfortable doing things that you could fail."

"And Jaden is 100 percent fearless, he will do anything, you know? So as a parent it's scary, it's really terrifying, but he is completely willing to live and die by his own artistic decisions and he just doesn't concern himself with what people think."

Is it wrong that I find comfort in hearing this parenting thing is nerve-wracking for Will and Jada, too?

I suppose the root of the feeling is a nagging suspicion I could have done (could be doing) better. Though the Smith family is a bit kooky at times, I more often than not find myself admiring their question-everything style. The way they experiment with their looks, spend time together and support their kids' interests is all commendable -- but I suspect the truth is I'd rather be one of their kids than raise one of them.

It's like I want my kids to have the same artsy don't-care-what-other-people-think confidence as Jaden and Willow, but I totally get what Will is saying about it being frightening. Not playing by the rules means there's no script for what's going to come next.

Do you see gender-fluid style as become more popular in years to come? Is there a level of raising kids not to care what others think that's too far?

Join the conversation

Photo: Buckner/Variety/REX/Shutterstock

 

11 young celebrities who don’t identify as straight or gay:

Lily Rose Depp, daughter of actor Johnny Depp, identified herself as sexually fluid as part of the Self Evident Truths art project in 2015.

A message from the project's page explained, "I’m so proud of my baby girl @lilyrose_depp. She decided she wanted to be in @selfevidentproject because she falls somewhere on the vast spectrum, and I couldn’t be happier to welcome her to the family. She’s a tiny gem of a good human. #prouduncle #weareyou.”

(WWD/REX/Shutterstock)

Rowan Blanchard made headlines in early 2016 for opening up about her sexuality. The Girl Meets World star shared, "In my life [I've] only ever liked boys. However I personally don’t wanna label myself as straight, gay or whateva so I am not gonna give myself labels to stick with—just existing… Yes, [I'm] open to liking any gender in future is why I identify as queer."

PFLAG elaborates on the word by sharing: “Think of queer as an umbrella term. It includes anyone who a) wants to identify as queer and b) who feels somehow outside of the societal norms in regards to gender or sexuality. This, therefore, could include the person who highly values queer theory concepts and would rather not identify with any particular label, the gender fluid bisexual, the gender fluid heterosexual, the questioning LGBT person, and the person who just doesn’t feel like they quite fit in to societal norms and wants to bond with a community over that.”

(PR Photos)

In early 2016, Amandla Stenberg said the following while being interviewed by Solange Knowles:

“It’s a really really hard thing to be silenced and it’s deeply bruising to fight against your identity and to mold yourself into shapes that you just shouldn’t be in. As someone who identifies as a black, bisexual woman I’ve been through it, and it hurts, and it’s awkward and it’s uncomfortable…but then I realized because of Solange and Ava DuVernay and Willow and all the black girls watching this right now, that there’s absolutely nothing to change.

We cannot be suppressed. We are meant to express our joy and our love and our tears and be big and bold and definitely not easy to swallow…Here I am being myself and it’s definitely hard and vulnerable and it’s definitely a process but I’m learning and I’m growing.”

(PR Photos)

When asked if she was dating her male Divergent costar, actress Shailene Woodley frankly told The Hollywood Reporter, "I fall in love with human beings based on who they are, not based on what they do or what sex they are."

(PR Photos)

Songstress Kesha insisted to Seventeen that she falls in love with a person's "sprit" rather than their gender.

"I don’t love just men. I love people," she explained. "It’s not about a gender. It’s just about the spirit that exudes from that other person you’re with."

(PR Photos)

Ezra Miller also identifies as queer, choosing the term as a descriptor for himself in a 2012 issue of Out.

The actor, whom you may recognize from The Perks of Being a Wallflower and We Need to Talk About Kevin, later elaborated, "I think there are a lot of people who fall on this open spectrum of sexuality. My friends and I use that word as an all-encompassing banner and for every human being. There should be an ongoing question and investigation of who you love and everything that’s involved with that very tricky and beautiful thing."

(PR Photos)

Keke Palmer let her video do the talking in 2015. Referring to how in "I Don't Belong to You" she's seen walking out on a guy and ends up knocking on a woman's door the singer and actress told People:

The video was to represent the young woman today — it's not the traditional woman anymore — and not the specifics of "Am I gay? Am I straight? Am I bi?" I'm making the rules for myself, and I don't have to be stuck down to one label ... I don't feel the need to define nothin' to nobody, because I'm always changing. Why say that I'm this or that when I might not be tomorrow? I'm gonna follow my own feelings and my own heart.

(PR Photos)

Miley Cyrus has made it clear she has no problem being open about her sexuality, and she chooses to be vocal so that others who are struggling to fit in might find some comfort.

Telling Elle UK about being pansexual (somebody who open to either falling in love and or being sexually attracted to people of all genders) the singer said in 2015, "I’m very open about it — I’m pansexual. But I’m not in a relationship. I’m 22, I’m going on dates, but I change my style every two weeks, let alone who I’m with."

She later told Paper, "I am literally open to every single thing that is consenting and doesn’t involve an animal and everyone is of age. Everything that’s legal, I’m down with. Yo, I’m down with any adult — anyone over the age of 18 who is down to love me. I don’t relate to being boy or girl, and I don’t have to have my partner relate to boy or girl."

(PR Photos)

Though Ruby Rose came out as a lesbian at age 12, she grew up as a child with gender nonconformity. She told News Corp Australia, "I am very gender fluid and feel more like I wake up every day sort of gender neutral."

The Orange is the New Black star went on to share, "Whether straight, gay, bi, trans... body image and identity can be a struggle for us all."

(PR Photos)

After Vogue implied Cara Delevingne's bisexuality was a phase when she told the mage she was in love with a woman, the actress clarified to The New York Times: "My sexuality is not a phase. I am who I am."

"I haven't made a concrete decision about anything," the Paper Towns star also told People. "Every day, I change. Every day, I'm discovering new things about myself."

(PR Photos)

Twilight star Kristen Stewart told Nylon, "If you feel like you really want to define yourself, and you have the ability to articulate those parameters and that in itself defines you, then do it. But I am an actress, man. I live in the f--king ambiguity of this life and I love it. I don't feel like it would be true for me to be like, 'I'm coming out!'"

She went on to add, "I think, in three or four years, there are going to be a whole lot more people who don't think it's necessary to figure out if you're gay or straight. It's like, just do your thing."

(PR Photos)

The very first question Christina Aguilera asks new moms

by

Sara McGinnis

posted in Celebrities

Forget trying to get the details on if baby is eating well and sleeping through the night, Christina Aguilera has something else on her mind when she gets a chance to talk to a brand new mom.

The mother of two recently opened up to Women's Health about looking out for herself (as well as women far and wide) by explaining, "Having children is the ultimate joy, and I love my kids, but women have to find time to nurture themselves. If someone has a baby, the first thing I'm like is, 'OK, are you taking care of you?'"

"Mothers are constantly expected to be the nurturers, the givers, the providers of a comfortable home. We're expected to be pregnant, have the kids, breastfeed once we have the babies. And we're expected to look amazing after baby, right?" the singer went on to vent to the magazine about myriad of pressures moms are facing. "Keep our husbands and boyfriends interested—because we're supposed to get back to sexy and keep things exciting in the bedroom. There's such a long list."

With that in mind, you can bet Christina Aguilera has more to say to anyone with a newborn in their arms.

"I would say to any woman: 'Don't be too hard on yourself!' If you're not feeling confident on a certain day, you have to let that go, and own, 'Yeah, I'm not feeling confident today,' and you move on and try to enjoy the best you can. "I'm not into deprivation; I'm not into suffering into getting a great body or the body that you want," the mother of Max and Summer went on to share. "I'm into enjoying life, being conscious and aware, but also breathing into yourself and owning what you got."

But be sure not to take Xtina's wariness of trying to do to much to mean she isn't a fan of being a mom. Describing her 1-year-old daughter as "the joy of my life," she's so in love with her little one she even briefly reconsidered her baby name pick.

She added, "I swear if I hadn't called her Summer I would've called her Joy because she just lights up a room and she illuminates brightness and happiness."

Isn't that sweet? (Although, as the mother of one very "spirited" child, I'm not sure we should all rename our children based on their moods...)

I was quite pleased to read about how Christina puts top priority on new moms, because the more years I spend being a mom the more I get a sense of just how big of a life transition it is.

When my first son was born I knew lots of people having babies, and in my head I downplayed how much we were going through. There's a chance I subconsciously did that so as not to freak myself out, but now that I'm close to a decade away from pregnancy I feel like I can more clearly see the gravity of it all. Like Christina, I want to encourage moms to have no shame in asking for and receiving help, as well as taking their time to "bounce back" (whatever that even means). Having a baby is a big deal, let's treat it as such by setting realistic expectations and taking it easy on ourselves!

What do you think a new mom most needs to be asked, or needs to hear?

Join the conversation

Photos: PR Photos

 

A look at celebrities who you'll recognize by one name, but they were given another at birth:

Mariah Carey doesn't mind the pacifier, but what about Nick?

by

Sara McGinnis

posted in Celebrities

Two years after the last go-round, Mariah Carey has once again kicked off the great pacifier debate by posting a photo of her 4-year-old son with a binky in his mouth.

In a recent snap posted to Instagram, Moroccan can be seen in the background of the "movie night" fun with a pacifier. Though the image on the whole is a sweet look at this famous mom having a little fun with her twins, commenters are a bit appalled by the binky.

One opinionated fan wrote, "i KNOW her son does NOT have a damn pacifier in his mouth ? Smdh. If so, He is too damn big smh, she oughta be ashamed if so."

Another chimed in, "And take that thing out of his life already! Stop being so lazy and not wanting to deal with weening him off...What the hell else do you have to do that's soooooooo important that child rearing doesn't fit in the schedule??? Jesus..."

While I'm fine with Mariah Carey being fine with it, because after all they're her kids to raise as she sees fit, I am wondering right now about how the twins' father, Nick Cannon, feels about this pic.

You'll recall that in 2013, before he and Mariah separated, she alluded to a disagreement between them on the subject of pacifiers.

Posting a photo of her sleeping son she wrote at the time: “Now listen … Daddy will be quite perturbed when he sees this chile with a binky but he JUST turned 2! why deprive them so soon? I know, I know.. Nick is right .. ‘C’mon! #beautiful #mommycanttakeit!"

I can't imagine that two full years later he's going to be any more pleased with the situation!

On the positive side, it's been a long time since Moroccan has been seen in public with a pacifier, so I'd venture to guess the binky has at least been restricted to bedtime, but on the other hand it's got to be frustrating if you're Nick.

I don't know what more he can do at this point, as it's clear Mariah knows his stance and isn't on board with getting rid of the pacifier. I'm thankful this wasn't a battle my husband and I had to go through, but of course there are other things. Like, for instance, our 11-year-old wanting to bike to the store by himself. It's not overly far, but it's a busy intersection not that far off the highway! Drivers just aren't on the lookout for kids in that area.

(Can you guess which side of this issue I'm on? Sigh.)

Our big kid got to go once, when I wasn't at home to squash the idea, and I have an entire heap of mixed feelings about the whole situation. Namely, my son and husband both know I don't think it's safe and yet it happened anyhow. For the record, he did make it there and back unscathed, and hasn't yet asked to go again, but I know it's only a matter of time before this disagreement pops back into our lives.

How are parenting disagreements handled in your house? What advice would you give Nick (or me)?

Join the conversation

Photos: Jim Smeal/BEImages, Matt Baron/BEImages

 

Moroccan Cannon isn't the only celebrity tot who's fond of the pacifier. More photos of Hollywood's binky-loving wee ones here:

Ryan Reynolds pokes fun at "dumb" celebrity baby names

by

Carolyn Robertson

posted in Celebrities

It could have been way worse!

That's what Ryan Reynolds has to say to anyone who doesn't like his daughter's name, James.

Ryan and his wife Blake Lively may have hopped aboard a hot Hollywood trend with their gender-bending pick, but they've taken a fair bit of flak for it. The Deadpool star seems unfazed by the criticism, though, pointing out that by celebrity standards the name James, even for a girl, is pretty tame.

“In the spectrum of weird celebrity baby names, I don’t really feel like we’re breaking new ground here. I didn’t call her Summer Squash Meadowlark,” Ryan, whose daughter celebrated her first birthday in December, joked during a recent appearance on Good Morning Britain.

It sounds like compared to the alternatives, James is positively run-of-the-mill: “I thought of going with all the letters silent in her name and it’d just be pronounced [long breath out],” Ryan said, adding. "Brought to you by the department of "Giving Dumb Celebrities Ideas."

You may laugh, but wait for it. Some famous moms- and dads-to-be out there have probably already added Ryan's funny suggestion to their baby name shortlist!

Ryan and Blake's choice may not be my favorite, but I do appreciate the sentiment behind it. Baby James was named after Ryan's father, who sadly passed away late last year.

Baby name controversy aside, the 39-year-old actor says he is head-over-heels with fatherhood.

I love being a father,” he said, adding. "I don’t want to be one of those celebs who talks about being a parent like they’re the only person in the world who has ever managed to conceive and bear a child.... It’s the most common thing in the world but the most profound. It’s super fun. I just love it.”

What do you think of traditionally "boy" names for girls? And vice versa?

Which other celebrities have joined the gender-bending trend? Take a look!

Photo: REX Features

Why Haylie Duff chose to slow down her post-baby weight loss

by

Sara McGinnis

posted in Celebrities

First-time mom Haylie Duff has found herself stuck between slimming down for a great "post-baby body" and trying to use that same body to feed her daughter. In her experience, doing both at the same time is a struggle.

"I had sort of an interesting situation when I was nursing where if I was working out too much or cutting my calories, my milk supply really went down," the Real Girl’s Kitchen host, who is the older sister of fellow mom Hilary Duff, recently told Wonderwall.

"So for me, it was a struggle because I really wanted to focus on losing weight and getting my body back," the mother of 9-month-old Ryan Ava elaborated. "But at the end of the day, I had to sit down and make the decision that meant the most to me — and that was breastfeeding my baby."

"It’s a slow and steady process — the same way it was when I gained it," Haylie Duff went on to say on the subject of weight, focusing on the bright side. "I’m feeling positive about it. Every week it’s like more off and more off. It’s just gonna be what it’s gonna be. The plus side is I have a beautiful, healthy little girl."

Although the topic of breastfeeding comes up frequently in the celebrity parenting world, it isn't too often we hear discussions about troubles with supply. At the same time, it's an issue I hear about fairly regularly in real life.

Recently a friend of mine has been struggling mightily to breastfeed, and we had the most touching, honest conversation. She nearly choked up trying to explain to me how she's perfectly fine with the idea of formula feeding on the whole, but personally experiencing watching her dreams of nursing disappear has been heart wrenching.

Isn't it funny how we can be perfectly fine with an idea on the surface, but when it's actually happening to us there's a whole new emotional depth to the story? My heart ached for her.

Haylie's story also reminds me of a conversation I had with another mom years ago. She also struggled mightily with supply issues, and I gave her the same "whatever works for you and the baby is just fine" speech, but much later she revealed she'd put herself on a strict lose-the-baby-weight diet. This was with her first baby, and I think she intensely longed to whip back into her old self and rock the ideal of motherhood. She wanted to be the one to do it all.

She later came to believe the low calorie diet was largely to blame for her low milk supply, and then had to deal with some guilt over having played a role in it not working out. That being said, I'm happy to report she had an easier time with her other children.

Still though, her case and Haylie's make me wonder if it's time we talked more often about how the pressure to lose the baby weight can have effects some aren't expecting.

Have you also faced supply issues? Any idea why, or did anything help correct it?

Join the conversation

Photo: Unimedia Images/REX/Shutterstock

 

Speaking of breastfeeding, a look back at some our favorite nursing photos from 2015:

"I felt as though I had found my calling," says Munich-based photographer Tammy Nicole, recalling her first photo session with a breastfeeding mom and baby. Looking at this stunning collection of images, it's hard to disagree.

See more: 27 breastfeeding photos that will take your breath away
Photo: Tammy Nicole Photography

Photographer Ivette Ivens' work has been featured by countless media outlets around the world. This ethereal series, she explains, aims to "depict the way each woman feels while nursing: pure, beautiful, saintly, celestial."

See more: Stunning photos show the beauty of breastfeeding toddlers
Photo: Ivette Ivens

This very talented group of photographers picked some of their most powerful and moving images to share with us in celebration of World Breastfeeding Week. We think you'll love them as much as we do.

See more: Top photographers share their favorite breastfeeding photos
Photo: Brynja Photography

“I know there will be people who don’t agree with me nursing in uniform. There are no regulations forbidding me to do so. I am a mother. Both inside and outside of my uniform. Breastfeeding is part of motherhood for me,”says Jonea, the subject of this much talked about image snapped by photographer Jade Beall.

See more: Powerful photo of female soldier breastfeeding speaks volumes
Photo: Jade Beall

"It’s hard, it’s a commitment, it’s a sacrifice. I’ve been frustrated, I’ve wanted to give up. I’ve been told I can’t do it. I’ve been asked why I don’t just give bottles," Ohio mom Brittany Yankowski tells BabyCenter of breastfeeding her triplets. She talked to BabyCenter to tell us how - and why - she does it.

See more: Breastfeeding triplets: One mom of five’s amazing story
Photo: Babymonster Photography

Photographer Erin White captures nursing as you've never seen it before. Her gorgeous, wild breastfeeding photo shoot proved to be quite controversial.

See more: Wild breastfeeding photos reveal natural beauty
Photo: Erin White Photography

These images by Suzie Blake, on the other hand, will look very familiar to many moms. "This is about milk leaks and ratty hair," she tells us of the candid shots. "This is about giving in to all the demands of your 2-year-old while you try to feed your newborn. This is about dishes piled up in the kitchen and dirty laundry building in the corner."

See more: This is what breastfeeding really looks like
Photo: Suzie Blake

Photographer Jade Beall is used to being behind the lens, but she stepped into the spotlight when she posted this image of her nursing her 3 1/2-year-old son. “I see that with my discomfort in breastfeeding my son in public these days that there is a whole new way for me to promote and support feminism,” she said of her decision to share her own breastfeeding story.

See more: Bold photo gives a real-life look at extended breastfeeding
Photo: Jade Beall

This mesmerizing shoot by photographer Kyiera Jones is truly out of this world. These mermaid moms are unexpectedly unforgettable.

See more: Magical images: Breastfeeding moms like you’ve never seen
Photo: Kyiera Jones

It’s not something you’d expect to see smack in the middle of downtown Chicago: A group of 12 mothers gathered on a meridian at a busy intersection confidently, defiantly even, nursing their babies. That's exactly what happened, though, thanks to a jaw-dropping shoot staged by "Badass Breastfeeder" Abby Theuring and photographer Ivette Ivens.

See more: Photo: Badass breastfeeding moms literally stop traffic
Photo: Ivette Ivens & Abby Theurig

"Motherhood ain't pretty," mom Elisha Wilson Beach, who is married to actor Michael Beach, captioned this candid Instagram post. She thought it was funny. Others, apparently, did not. One thing's for sure: It definitely got people talking.

See more: “Motherhood ain’t pretty.” Mom’s “TMI” breastfeeding photo goes viral
Photo: Elisha Wilson Beach

Angel Mickelle delivered her son at home, on her own. There was no doctor to catch the baby, no midwife to help her through the contractions. When baby Leo arrived, she immediately nursed him, and his big brother, too. “I wanted to tandem breastfeed as a way to introduce Paulo to his little brother," she explains. "To me it felt like the most gentle way for Leo to meet all of us and us to meet him.”

See more: Photos: Brave unassisted birth, immediate tandem breastfeeding
Photo: Earthside Birth Photography

Over the years, Jade Beall has turned her lens on expectant mothers, new mothers, survivors of abuse, survivors of eating disorders, survivors of cancer and mastectomies. Men, women, young, old. Her work is often controversial, and this breastfeeding shot proved to be no exception.

“We are so use to seeing hyper-sexualized images of women everywhere we turn, but when I want to celebrate a woman in an non-sexualized pose, nude, feeding a human that her body grew and feeds and calling her cellulite, curves or bones beautiful."

See more: The breastfeeding photo that sparked a backlash
Photo: Jade Beall

Pregnant Ali Fedotowsky: "We've already had 5 ultrasounds!"

by

Carolyn Robertson

posted in Celebrities

It's been almost a month since Bachelorette alumni Ali Fedostowsky shared her hilarious "mom jeans" pregnancy announcement. While she's clearly thrilled about the baby news, it doesn't sound as if she's been having much fun.

The 31-year-old mom-to-be updated fans on her rough first trimester in a post on her web site AliLuvs.com

"The first trimester was not fun and was really hard for me. It was rough because I was sick all the time! I lost about 7lbs in my first trimester because I couldn’t really eat anything. I only ate clementines and dry toast for about a month between weeks 7-12. I remember breaking down in tears once because all I wanted was to want a pizza. It’s like I knew I liked pizza, I knew how delicious it tasted, but the thought of it made me sick to my stomach.... I felt like I constantly had a hangover but I never got to enjoy the fun part the night before. That’s the best way I can describe my first trimester, one long hangover."

Ali doesn't shy away from sharing the sometimes unpleasant realities of pregnancy, going on to reveal that on top of the nausea and exhaustion she suffered terrible constipation: "Have you ever cried because you couldn’t go #2?" she asks.

I'm guessing a lot of moms know exactly what she's talking about. We hear a lot about the morning sickness, and rightly so, but that awful first trimester constipation doesn't tend to get talked about very much.

Ali, who is engaged to radio host Kevin Manno, recently revealed that she suffered a very early miscarriage not long ago, saying, "It was hard, cause it was such a huge disappointment. But, as sad as that was, it made me feel so much for women that actually spend a few weeks being pregnant and then suffer a loss. I can't imagine what that would be like."

Perhaps that's why, despite being not even halfway through her pregnancy, she has already had not just one or two but five ultrasounds!

"We also feel such a sense of relief when we see the baby at those appointments, and as soon as we leave the doctors office, the panic sets back in," she admits. "All we want to do is see the baby again! Is this what being a parent is like? Constantly worrying about your child? Or at least that's what it feels like it's going to be like for me."

I didn't go in for that many scans, but I do remember that feeling of uncertainty and worry, particularly in the early months before your belly really pops. Seeing your little baby wiggling around on the ultrasound screen can be very reassuring.

Best wishes to Ali for a smooth and comfortable trimester #2!

What were your worst first trimester symptoms?

Here's what you have to look forward to, Ali! 25 funny 3rd trimester confessions:

Gwyneth Paltrow: We're "creating a new archetype of a woman"

by

Sara McGinnis

posted in Celebrities

Gwyneth Paltrow seems to know she sometimes says things that make our eyes roll, but are all the jabs directed her way deserved? The mother of two, who infamously went through a "conscious uncoupling" with Chris Martin in 2014, has opened up about Goop, being a mom, and making mistakes.

A peek at what the 43-year-old actress shared with Glamour magazine for their March issue...

Gwyneth Paltrow on getting flack for Goop: Sometimes I'll get annoyed if someone's like, “Goop is so expensive.” I'm like, “Have you looked at the website? Have you seen the range of price points? 'Cause we sell things that are $8.” I'm like, “If you want to f--k with me, bring your A-game. At least have all your information.” Once in a while, if I'm exhausted and overwhelmed, I'll be like, “Ugh, that bugs me,” or, “That hurt my feelings.” But very rarely. I don't lose sleep over it. It's my business to live my life and learn my lessons. I don't care what anybody else thinks.

On working with other lifestyle brand owners, such as Jessica Alba and Reese Witherspoon: “I think it’s appalling. And the worst part of it is how [critics] try to pit us against each other. The energy could not be more opposite...We help each other; we consult each other.

I think we’re in the midst of creating a new archetype of a woman, and we’re gonna get there. And I’ve never minded pushing anything along, taking some slings and arrows. I mean, when [my children] have a hole in their uniform, I sew it. I make the food; I bathe them. And I’m a sexual being and a powerful woman and entrepreneur. I’m all of those things. We now realize that we have permission to be everything.

On growing up with famous parents: People think, ‘She’s just a rich kid.’ Until I was 18, I was. Then I was broke. I’ve never taken a dime off my parents. I’m completely self-made. I went to UC Santa Barbara, and when I quit to try to be an actress, my dad was like, ‘That’s great, but I’m not gonna help you.'

So I got an apartment with a roommate; I worked as a hostess at a restaurant; I would scrounge quarters to buy Starbucks -- and walk there to save gas. I remember once asking my dad for money, like, ‘Please, I’m really stuck. Can you help?’ And he said, 'You’re more than welcome to come over for dinner.' That was it."

On co-parenting Apple and Moses with Chris Martin: We spend a lot of time together. He’s been away for two weeks [promoting his album]. Last night he got in at midnight and slept here so he could surprise the kids in the morning, we could all have breakfast, and he could take them to school."

So … we’re not living together, but he’s more than welcome to be with us whenever he wants. And vice versa: I sleep in his house in Malibu a lot with the kids. We’re still very much a family, even though we don’t have a romantic relationship. He’s like my brother.

While you can count me among the many who weren't too sure about "conscious uncoupling" to begin with, I love a good story about exes making it work. Kudos to Gwyneth and Chris for finding a way to get along and avoid the custody drama so many of their celebrity counterparts get caught up in.

That being said, I'm a bit cautious to jump wholly on board with this star's "new archetype of a woman" idea. Obviously it's not that I don't want women to "have permission to be everything," but it's a slippery slope to find yourself believing you can do and be everything.

Over the years I've come to realize the expectations I have for myself and how life ought to be play a big part in how satisfied I feel with reality. I'm a big fan of dreaming up a bright and busy future, but then when things don't pan out (typically because there just aren't enough hours in the day to make it all happen) I'm left intensely frustrated.

For the time being, I've had more success with an aim small, miss small approach, rather than chasing the idea of doing and being all the things.

Do you think Gwyneth deserves all the flack she gets? What do you say about her theory on a new archetype of a woman?

Share with us

Photo: PR Photos

 

In case you can't quite recall, a look back at noteworthy things Gwyneth Paltrow has shared over the years: